exenter
11-02-2007, 03:43 AM
Taken from another forum:
>>When you occasionally have a really bad day, and you just need to take it
>>out on someone, don't take it out on someone you know, take it out on
>>someone you don't know.
>>
>>
>>
>>It all started one day when I was sitting at my desk and remembered a
>>phone
>>call I had forgotten to make. I found the number and dialed it.
>>
>>
>>
>>A man answered, saying, "Hello." I politely said, "This is Chris. May I
>>please speak with Robin Carter? "Suddenly, the phone was slammed down on
>>me.
>>
>>
>>
>>I couldn't believe that anyone could be so rude.
>>
>>
>>
>>I tracked down Robin's correct number and called her. I had transposed the
>> ;last two digits of her phone number. After hanging up with her, I decided
>>to
>>call the 'wrong' number again. When the same guy answered the phone, I
>>yelled, "You're an asshole!" and hung up. I wrote his number down with the
>>word 'asshole' next to it, and put it in my desk drawer.
>>
>>
>>
>>Every couple of weeks, when I was paying bills or had a really bad day,
>>I'd
>>call him up and yell, "You're an asshole!" It always cheered me up.
>>
>>
>>
>>When Caller ID came to our area, I thought my therapeutic 'asshole'
>>calling
>>would have to stop. So, I called his number and said, "Hi, this is John
>>Smith from the Telephone Company. I'm just calling to see if you're
>>interested in the Caller ID program?" He yelled, "NO!" and slammed the
>>phone
>>down.
>>
>>
>>
&g t;>I quickly called him back and said, "That's because you're an asshole!"
>>
>>
>>
>>One day I was at the store, getting ready to pull into a parking spot.
>>Some
>>guy in a black BMW cut me off and pulled into the spot I had patiently
>>waited for. I hit the horn and yelled that I had been waiting for the
>>spot.
>>The idiot ignored me. I noticed a "For Sale" sign in his car window, so I
>>wrote down his number. A couple of days later, right after calling the
>>first
>>asshole, ( I had his number on speed dial ), I thought I had better call
>>the
>>BMW asshole, too.
>>
>>
>>
>>I said, "Is this the man with the black BMW for sale?"
>>
>>
>>
>>"Yes, it is."
>>
>>
>>
>>"Can you tell me where I can see it?"
>>
>>
>>
>>"Yes, I live at 1802 West 34th Street. It's a yellow house, and the car's
>>parked right out in front."
>>
>>
>>
>>"What's your name?" I asked.
>>
>>
>>
>>"My name is Don Hansen," he said.
>>
>>
>>
>>"When's a good time to catch you, Don?"
>>
>>
>>
>>"I'm home every evening after five."
>>
>>
>>
>>"Listen, Don, can I tell you something?"
>>
>>
>>
>>"Yes?"
>>
>>
>>
>>"Don, you're an asshole." Then I hung up, and added his number to my speed
>>dial, too. Now, when I had a problem, I had two assholes to call.
>>
>>
>>
>>But after several months of calling them, it wasn't as enjoyable as it
>>used
>>to be. So , I came up with an idea. I called Asshole #1.
>>
>>
>>
>>"Hello."
>>
>>
>>
>>"You're an asshole!" (But I didn't hang up.)
>>
>>
>>
>>"Are you still there?" he asked.
>>
>>
>>
>>"Yeah," I said.
>>
>>
>>
>>"Stop calling me," he screamed.
>>
>>
>>
>>"Make me," I said.
>>
>>
>>
>>"Who are you?" he asked.
>>
>>
>>
>>"My name is Don Hansen."
>>
>>
>>
>>"Yeah? Where do you live?"
>>
>>
>>
>>"Asshole, I live at 1802 West 34th Street, a yellow house, with my black
>>Beamer parked in front."
>>
>>
>>
>>He said, "I'm coming over right now, Don. And you had better start saying
>>your prayers."
>>
>>
>>
>>I said, "Yeah, like I'm really scared, asshole."
>>
>>
>>
>>Then I called Asshole #2.
>>
>>
>>
>>"Hello?" he said.
>>
>>
>>
>>"Hello, asshole," I said.
>>
>>
>>
>>He yelled, "If I ever find out who you are!" "You'll what?" I said.
>>
>>
>>
>>"I'll kick your ass," he exclaimed.
>>
>>
>>
>>I answered, "Well, asshole, here's your chance. I'm coming over right
>>now."
>>
>>
>>
>>Then I hung up and immediately called the police, saying that I lived at
>>1802 West 34th Street, and that I was on my way over there to kill my gay
>>lover.
>>
>>
>>
>>Then I called Channel 3 News about the gang war going down on West 34th
>>Street.
>>
>>
>>
>>I quickly got into my car and headed over to 34th street. There I saw two
>>assholes beating the crap out of each other in front of six squad cars, a
>>police helicopter, and a news crew.
>>
>>
>>
>>NOW, I feel better. Anger management really works. :)
>>When you occasionally have a really bad day, and you just need to take it
>>out on someone, don't take it out on someone you know, take it out on
>>someone you don't know.
>>
>>
>>
>>It all started one day when I was sitting at my desk and remembered a
>>phone
>>call I had forgotten to make. I found the number and dialed it.
>>
>>
>>
>>A man answered, saying, "Hello." I politely said, "This is Chris. May I
>>please speak with Robin Carter? "Suddenly, the phone was slammed down on
>>me.
>>
>>
>>
>>I couldn't believe that anyone could be so rude.
>>
>>
>>
>>I tracked down Robin's correct number and called her. I had transposed the
>> ;last two digits of her phone number. After hanging up with her, I decided
>>to
>>call the 'wrong' number again. When the same guy answered the phone, I
>>yelled, "You're an asshole!" and hung up. I wrote his number down with the
>>word 'asshole' next to it, and put it in my desk drawer.
>>
>>
>>
>>Every couple of weeks, when I was paying bills or had a really bad day,
>>I'd
>>call him up and yell, "You're an asshole!" It always cheered me up.
>>
>>
>>
>>When Caller ID came to our area, I thought my therapeutic 'asshole'
>>calling
>>would have to stop. So, I called his number and said, "Hi, this is John
>>Smith from the Telephone Company. I'm just calling to see if you're
>>interested in the Caller ID program?" He yelled, "NO!" and slammed the
>>phone
>>down.
>>
>>
>>
&g t;>I quickly called him back and said, "That's because you're an asshole!"
>>
>>
>>
>>One day I was at the store, getting ready to pull into a parking spot.
>>Some
>>guy in a black BMW cut me off and pulled into the spot I had patiently
>>waited for. I hit the horn and yelled that I had been waiting for the
>>spot.
>>The idiot ignored me. I noticed a "For Sale" sign in his car window, so I
>>wrote down his number. A couple of days later, right after calling the
>>first
>>asshole, ( I had his number on speed dial ), I thought I had better call
>>the
>>BMW asshole, too.
>>
>>
>>
>>I said, "Is this the man with the black BMW for sale?"
>>
>>
>>
>>"Yes, it is."
>>
>>
>>
>>"Can you tell me where I can see it?"
>>
>>
>>
>>"Yes, I live at 1802 West 34th Street. It's a yellow house, and the car's
>>parked right out in front."
>>
>>
>>
>>"What's your name?" I asked.
>>
>>
>>
>>"My name is Don Hansen," he said.
>>
>>
>>
>>"When's a good time to catch you, Don?"
>>
>>
>>
>>"I'm home every evening after five."
>>
>>
>>
>>"Listen, Don, can I tell you something?"
>>
>>
>>
>>"Yes?"
>>
>>
>>
>>"Don, you're an asshole." Then I hung up, and added his number to my speed
>>dial, too. Now, when I had a problem, I had two assholes to call.
>>
>>
>>
>>But after several months of calling them, it wasn't as enjoyable as it
>>used
>>to be. So , I came up with an idea. I called Asshole #1.
>>
>>
>>
>>"Hello."
>>
>>
>>
>>"You're an asshole!" (But I didn't hang up.)
>>
>>
>>
>>"Are you still there?" he asked.
>>
>>
>>
>>"Yeah," I said.
>>
>>
>>
>>"Stop calling me," he screamed.
>>
>>
>>
>>"Make me," I said.
>>
>>
>>
>>"Who are you?" he asked.
>>
>>
>>
>>"My name is Don Hansen."
>>
>>
>>
>>"Yeah? Where do you live?"
>>
>>
>>
>>"Asshole, I live at 1802 West 34th Street, a yellow house, with my black
>>Beamer parked in front."
>>
>>
>>
>>He said, "I'm coming over right now, Don. And you had better start saying
>>your prayers."
>>
>>
>>
>>I said, "Yeah, like I'm really scared, asshole."
>>
>>
>>
>>Then I called Asshole #2.
>>
>>
>>
>>"Hello?" he said.
>>
>>
>>
>>"Hello, asshole," I said.
>>
>>
>>
>>He yelled, "If I ever find out who you are!" "You'll what?" I said.
>>
>>
>>
>>"I'll kick your ass," he exclaimed.
>>
>>
>>
>>I answered, "Well, asshole, here's your chance. I'm coming over right
>>now."
>>
>>
>>
>>Then I hung up and immediately called the police, saying that I lived at
>>1802 West 34th Street, and that I was on my way over there to kill my gay
>>lover.
>>
>>
>>
>>Then I called Channel 3 News about the gang war going down on West 34th
>>Street.
>>
>>
>>
>>I quickly got into my car and headed over to 34th street. There I saw two
>>assholes beating the crap out of each other in front of six squad cars, a
>>police helicopter, and a news crew.
>>
>>
>>
>>NOW, I feel better. Anger management really works. :)